Social Development
The child’s social environments offer them new opportunities for socialisation and for gaining new learning experiences.
During middle childhood (between the ages of 11 and 16), children become more inclined to interact with other children of the same gender and age. Children interact with other children for the sake of friendship, affection and fellowship, while interaction between children and adults is based on the child’s need for protection and care. So a parent cannot be their child’s friend. Anyway, it is not healthy for a 10-year-old and a 35-year-old to be buddies. Children mostly choose their own friends. They also end a friendship when they are no longer satisfied with the interaction. It is with other children that children practise and refine their social skills.
4.1 Peer Group
The peer group plays an extremely important role in the child’s development, filling the following main functions:
4.4.1 Comradeship: The child has friends to play with, to talk to and pass time with. The peer group supplies love and affection.
4.4.2 Opportunities for trying out new conduct, especially conduct that adults generally forbid: The peer group also provides opportunities for learning positive social skills, such as co-operation and negotiation.
4.4.3 The transfer of knowledge and information: Ranging from tasks such as the training of a friend in the use of a computer to jokes, puzzles, superstitions and games.
4.4.4 Obedience: A peer group teaches its members obedience to rules and regulations. Children learn that violating these rules and regulations can have negative consequences, and that compliance is rewarded with acceptance by the group.
4.4.5 Gender roles: The peer group expects each member of the group to conform to the group’s norms and standards — boys must be “real” boys and girls must be “real” girls. For instance, a boy regarded as a sissy is unlikely to be accepted by a peer group whose members are proud of their masculinity.
4.4.6 Emotional bond: The peer group causes a weakening of the emotional bond between child and their parents. This is an important step in the development of independence so that one day the child will be able to leave the parents’ home without experiencing intense psychological trauma.
4.4.7 Relationships: The peer group provides its members with experience of relationships in which they can compete with others (their peers) on an equal footing and thus refine their social skills, assertiveness, competitiveness as well as their abilities in co-operation and mutual understanding.
Nevertheless, excessive conformity with, and attachment to, the peer group could be detrimental. This conformity could, for instance, lead to children taking part in undesirable or illegal activities because of peer-group pressure. And the attachment to the group could be so strong that the child cannot develop the necessary degree of self-reliance and independence that should be achieved by the end of middle childhood.
Not all children are equally popular with other children. It was found that popular children are:
Ø friendlier
Ø more extroverted
Ø more co-operative
Ø generally more pleasant
Ø filled with more initiative
Ø more adaptable and more conforming
Ø more reliable
Ø affectionate
Ø considerate
Ø empowered with a realistic self-image
Ø able to perform well academically
Ø more attractive
Unpopularity in primary school is a variable that correlates very closely with behaviour problems or emotional disorders. A child’s popularity increases when they have been taught the appropriate social skills:
Ø how to conduct a conversation
Ø how to show interest in other people
Ø how to give advice