Character Development
Character is behaving in a certain way when no one is watching you.
The Great Wall of China is one of the great wonders of the world, a true masterpiece of engineering. I’m told that six horses could trot side-by-side on top of it. China built the wall to protect it from invasion. But in the first hundred years after the wall was completed, enemies invaded the country three times.[1] Do you know how?
The invaders didn’t go over the wall. They didn’t smash holes through it, or burn it down. Instead, they bribed the gatekeepers. While China was building this amazing defence system, it neglected its children by failing to build character in their lives — the type of character that could withstand temptation.
I think of that story whenever I hear parents talk of their dreams and goals for their children. Many parents today are vitally concerned with the education that their kids receive and the skills they develop. They spend hours shuttling them to school and to various extracurricular activities. They look forward to the day when their children will enter the working world and establish successful and lucrative careers.
One thing is often missing in these dreams and plans: character development.
Too many parents are more concerned with IQ than with CQ — character quotient.
7.1 Character or Reputation
When we see these two words together, we often mistakenly believe that you cannot have one without the other.
Reputation is what others around us think of us. It is really the opinion that is held by others concerning who we are and why we do what we do. We can have a “good” reputation, or a “bad” reputation. However, we must realise that both of these are relative, and that a “good” or “bad” reputation is only in the eye of the beholder.
Far more valuable is our Character. Character is who we are when no one is looking. It is not just the face in the mirror, but the “face behind the face”. A person with character is one who can stand fast in the face of false accusations, insinuations, slander and ridicule; who remains rock solid in the face of these abuses. Who remains undefeated by hurt, despair and depression. Reputations come and go; character will hold you safe through the storms. Develop character both in yourself and in your children, and you will never have regrets.
7.2 Values
Valuesare the desirable principles in someone’s character that society considers worthwhile. Friendliness and courage are values. Morals work with the judgment of values as they emerge in actions. Promptness is a value; therefore, it is morally wrong to be late to work. Your teen needs you to teach him/her values so they can create their own strong moral fibre.